Infomercials

The ESPN ads are hilarious. The latest, for ESPN 360, whatever that is, features the Infomercial legend Billy Mays, the guy who looks like Al Borland from Home Improvement and does the infomericals for products like OxiCleen and others. He's always yelling, like any informercial star worth his salt. If you are on an infomercial, you must yell, that's all there is to it.
In this ESPN commercial, Billy Mays is the host introducing this product, ESPN 360, whatever that is, like he would in an infomercial, yelling. I still don't know what ESPN 360 is, but the commercial was damn funny.

The other new ESPN is the one with Lebron going to his cubicle, but he notices that his chair his gone -- well, he's King James so it's actually a throne. He looks around for it and in the next cubicle, Scott Van Pelt is sitting in Lebron's throne, but when Lebron asks for it, Van Pelt acts like he doesn't know what Lebron is talking about. Very funny.

Infomercials are great. I've bought more products than I care to reveal after watching an infomercial. The latest one I always watch is for some kind of "internet business" where you don't do sales, you don't work, you don't buy inventory, you don't do anything -- apparently you just sit there in your house and the checks for thousands of dollars come rolling in for no reason.
I saw one the other night for how to make money in the "cash flow business." They never explained what the cash flow business is, but they told you how you can make hundreds of thousands of dollars on your lunch break. You better believe I googled "cash flow business." They kept repeating that phrase throughout the commercials so it would eventually sink into the heads of dummies like me. After about the 20th mention I said to myself, you know, I should look up this whole "cash flow business" thing to see what it's all about.
I'm also a sucker for the Kevin Trudeau infomercials. He's the guy who sells all those books about secrets "they" don't want you to know about. I know who "they" are, and I don't like "they." They are bad.
Then there is the Time Life music. I have a hard time changing the channel once I come across Russell Hitchcock and Graham Whatever from Air Supply. Then the siren songs of Bread or Maria Muldaur or Leo Sayer or Paper Lace (The Night Chicago Died) play and I am sucked in. It's not so much the music as it is what they look like -- the hair, the clothes, it's like these people from the 70s are beings from another planet.
Then there is the great Billy Mays, star of the ESPN 360 commercial, whatever that is.